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Being Queer

Anthony calls himself queer. He says, "I think that sexuality is fluid. A queer heart, to me, means having the capacity to love someone of the same sex. I've gotten into debates about the word queer with other people. It didn't even occur to me that it still has a stigma. I never hear people say it in a derogatory context. It doesn't have any charge for me at all that way."

Anthony came out to his parents when he was 18 years old. He did this at first by thanking his boyfriends in the biographies for plays he was in. Then he told his mother that he had a boyfriend. She was confused and saddened by this, but Anthony shared his relationships with her. Before she died of cancer recently, she said, "I used to think there was something wrong with your sexuality, but I know now that it's no different than the color of your eyes or your height or your voice. It's just the way you are." Anthony's father Douglass, on the other hand, was very open to him. He felt responsible in a positive way. To Anthony, he said, "I've always encouraged you to express yourself. I always felt it was OK to pursue happiness in relationships however or wherever or with whomever that path took you." Douglas had had previous experiences with gay men and found them to be delightful people.

Communicating with gay youth is very important for Anthony. He feels it is just as important to talk to straight youth about queer issues. He says, "Ideally, I'd love to see everyone talking to each other about everything. I have been so inspired and encouraged by the level of intelligent discourse going on around the country about sexuality." Anthony visits schools to talk to kids about these issues, and would like to do much more of this kind of thing in the future.

This is Anthony's boyfriends page. It has some great pictures of them together!